Mexico is so Beautiful!

Tait and I were able to go to a trip to Mexico this past April and let me tell you it was one of the best trips I have ever been on, it was wonderful. We were truly treated really nice and it was the most wonderful vacation. I strongly recommend to anyone to go there it was wonderful.

It’s funny I went to Mexico twice this year. Once in January with my coworkers and it was in Cajun and it was “okay” it was nice I mean we had some good times, but it was just another trip with my coworkers, nothing special. I would have preferred to go with my husband let me tell you it would have been more fun. So I was so excited when we were able to go together. It was such a beautiful place; we were right on the Gulf of Mexico on very secluded place miles away from the bigger resorts. We had security check us in you had to be on the list even to get into the resort. Once we check in we stayed there for the next 5 days. The front desk man was so nice he had our room upgraded from a regular suite to a master suite. It was so wonderful; I can’t even explain just how wonderful it was there. We spent 45 minutes so excited over our wonderful room with its own personal swimming pool, Jacuzzi, and outside shower to name just a few of the amazing amenities.  It was truly a really nice place.

We were at an all-inclusive my second experience with this and let me tell you that is the way to travel.  I enjoyed not having to pay any bills or anything.  It was just really fun.  Tait and I want to go back as soon as we can maybe try a different resort.

The resort we went to was the El Dorado Spa and Resort in River Maya, Mexico.  We were really lucky to enjoy this trip.  We did a lot of just relaxing it was great we looked forward to going to eat and just laying in the sun it was just so nice.  We had our own sun bed on our balcony and so we would play in our little pool then go dry on the sun bed and repeat.  We played in the pool at night and would finish the night in our little Jacuzzi tub in our room.  I felt like I was part fish. 

We found a pool table and so Tait and I once an evening would go and play pool.  The best thing is everything was free food, drinks, everything.  So we tried different things, that we normally don’t get the chance to try and we got to just enjoy each other.  We didn’t go off the resort Tait talked about going snorkeling but we kind of decided that we wanted to do the couple massage and that was kind of our plan of spending any money was to do that.  That was really nice.  We were in the same room just relaxing and having our joint massage.  You had the option of having the massage outside on this lifted platform by the beach but it was so hot there that I thought it would be really sticky so we decided that in a room would be best and you know that was truly nice. 

We really enjoyed the food there was 5 different restaurants on the resort so we would try different places. We also enjoyed room service too and that was nice too.  One night we just wanted a hamburger and shake so we ordered one.  Super nice super easy, another thing that was   really nice was the staff.

Everywhere you went all the staff would greet you by saying “Hola” so every time we hear that now we are kind of our sad.  We only talked to the kids once while we were in Mexico but I don’t think they really missed us b/c they didn’t ask to call us and we told them they could call us whenever they wanted.  We couldn’t make phone calls out but we could get phone calls in it was kind of fun to be totally disconnected from the world no phones or internet or anything, it was nice. 

During the vacation I did a lot of reading I was able to read the Hunger Games all three books and let me tell you I didn’t enjoy the books.  I thought the story was kind of depressing and pretty gross to be honest.  But I was also able to read all three 50 shades books and they were well really good.  I have joined a book club and it is a really fun group of ladies and this was the first group of books so I had to read them for book club J 

So next year Tait and I are taking the kids to Orlando to go to Universal Studios probably in the spring so that will be a nice trip for the kiddos.  I’m kind of excited to be able to take them to a vacation.  The girls travel okay by car, I’m still a little worried b/c Lehna still hates anything in a costume so that should be interesting but we’ll see what happens J

We have decided that Tait and I need to travel more often together we kind of missed that opportunity before we had kids mainly b/c we had no money.  So we are going to make it a goal of every 2 years to go on a trip like that.  Eventually we will take the girls with us but not yet J

Life in General

Well it’s finally time for an update.

I have to say that it’s easier NOT to do an update than it is for me to complete an update for some reason. I used to update all the time when I had “time at work” to do it back in Indiana than I got a different job and never had time to do anything personal any more b/c I was working all the time. Well that back fired… Oh well.

Well here’s the life update, since I updated what almost a year a go… yikes so much to update.

Well my most recent news is that I was let go from my job. Let me tell you it sucks. I have a new appreciation for anyone in my past that I have ever had to let go. When I worked as a Staffing Supervisor I was always letting people go from assignments for different reasons and let me tell you I never knew it felt so crappy. B/c let me tell you it feels pretty crappy. It was such a blow to my ego and self esteem that it truly has taken awhile just to climb back out from under it. And there are days that I slip back under the big rock. I think part of the reason is I used my success as rising from Staffing Consultant to Branch Manager in 3 years as kind of a “wow look at what I’ve accomplished, I’m so great” and when it’s taken you really don’t have any choices. I mean it’s gone. So I have lots of blessings that I’m grateful to have. I have a family, husband, home, and my health. You know MAJOR life blessings that people don’t always have; I just don’t have a career anymore. So where do I start. So I was let go unfairly I truly believe, I have some guilt but that’s mainly b/c that’s the type of person I am, I take everything personally and blame myself for things truly that aren’t my fault. But I was let go for failure to go my Kenosha Office. I didn’t get a big contract that would have “saved” me and in the 2 years I was there growing from 8 clients to 31 that simply wasn’t enough. Although I really don’t know what enough looks like. According to express Standards we were supposed to be at 40-50 clients. I didn’t think we were doing too badly because we had turnover and had to learn the market, oh and I had to learn my role as the Branch Manager. But for whatever reason that simply wasn’t good enough. I blame myself for not working harder and at times where I was in “down time” I could have been doing more sales calls, but what can I say. I tried. I don’t like failing at things. I don’t mind quitting things but failing is a completely different side of my brain that is hard to comprehend. I have never been asked to leave anything so this has been a learning experience.

I have to say that I have been depressed, ashamed, and humbled. I have been angry at Heavenly Father because he let me get fired, I know kind of ridiculous, but I couldn’t really blame myself anymore I was already doing that. I have written pretty horrible journals about myself, just self defeating thoughts about myself; pure self esteem boosters let me tell you. But it has helped. Just being able to journal really helped get the crap out of my head, and that’s really what I needed to do. I have really had a lot of support from Tait who constantly reminds me about my other blessings and that I need to take a look at the big picture. So at times it’s helpful and times it’s just annoying. So I have had a change of heart. I stopped going to church (starting slowly to return) but in my anger I didn’t want to even think about anything Positive just negative, that’s the kind of girl I am you know Miss Negative. Well let tell you those church people they HUNT you down and DON’T STOP ATTACKING! Good Grief! We had missionary visits and calls and invites, and mailers sent to us. I guess that’s what happens when you get on the inactive list. Funny part is Tait was still going he has a class to teach so he was attending that on a regular basis and going to Scouts, WASN’T THAT ENOUGH PEOPLE! Apparently not. So we got a call from the Bishop’s Secretary who wanted to meet up with us. Yeah I was more than thrilled let me tell you.

So we meet with him and he wanted to know what was going on with our family. Well let me tell you I spelled it out. I didn’t waste words I wasn't mad or anything just told him the way I was feeling and you know what he gave me two pieces of advice that really helped me change my attitude. The first thing he says was that the company I was at clearly didn’t appreciate the things I did for them, and they didn’t deserve me. The second thing he said was B/c the nature of Man sometimes Heavenly Father doesn’t have a say in what we on earth choose to do. So in fact my firing probably wasn’t inspired by him but instead was inspired by the nature of man. So than I felt pretty bad for blaming when in fact he could have been innocent of the charges that I was placing on him. So those things made me rethink things a little bit.

I’m still dealing with the Depression and shame, it’s shameful to be in my situation I think this is part of the taking everything eternally and blaming myself for something I didn’t have control over, you know it’s similar to what I did with Heavenly Father but it’s hard to have moments of “well that was pretty wrong” when you are dealing with your own feelings. But anyway. I have been truly humbled. I still am bitter but working on it. I am trying not to be angry any more but that’s hard when I get a rejection from an employer that’s usually when I have the flairs of anger, but it’s a working process. I’m a working process shoot.

So what now. Well I have to really stop being so hard on myself. It truly sucks to feel like this so I need to have some change in thoughts and expel my energy in a more positive way. I was talking to the doctor about my feelings (I’m on medication that he is monitoring) and he suggested that its b/c I have to find a new direction to move my energy that I was spending at work to another outlet. So I tried to move that energy to working out and you know I can count on one finger how long that lasted. So what I did was get a part time job. I talked to my true friends at Express and they helped me find a Part time Job and Jockey International which I was working just 18 hours a week as an office assistant, at least I had some way to direct this energy. So I have been doing this for the past 6 weeks and well. It’s been good really good, it gives me a reason to get up in the morning, and I was able to spend some time with the kids and that was really nice.

So in the mean time I have been applying to many jobs and going on many interviews and I have gotten a couple of offers and rejections but nothing wonderful. So I talked to some of my past contacts at Kenosha County and they said I should agree to do some Temporary work b/c they are always looking for temporary workers for different departments to cover sick leaves and etc. So I said “shoot sign me up” So last week they called me and offered me a position in DCFS which is the same department that Tait is in to cover a sick leave. The lady I’m covering will not be back the rest of the year. So I will be taking her place. But in the mean time, they will be looking for later this year b/c one of the other women is going to be retiring.  So there will be an opporutnity, if they like me to be hired on. So it might just turn into something good. Maybe.

I’m going to ride this out however at this position and see where it leads. Who knows? But in the meantime I am still trying to remain humble until this storm blows over and I can get in a long lasting position, I’m truly hoping this will work, but if not… than we’ll see what happens. Life only happens once right?

I’m still trying to recover and slowly I’ll come back to where I need to be it just will take some time. I just want to get through this without going postal on anyone. So that’s the latest and greatest update.